People have said I’m trying to avoid raiding… which is kind of true. I know I need to do it due to gear-related things (and the whole thing about a pet dropping from NM EC…plus 2 mounts now :/ And the title).

however, ignoring my busy schedule (have to head out soon actually), the big thing is just not feeling good enough. As a perfectionist, if I don’t feel I can perform perfectly or manage to be the top (which I never do, I suck too much), that is already making me feel too depressed to bother.

Ignoring that part, the big thing is all the stupidity over firsts still. I don’t care about firsts–what I do care about is how people have to go and start making it personal, even to people not involved. Constantly insulting and berating–both publicly and privately and it’s not funny. It isn’t cute, you look stupid, but it’s not something I can just be all “haha, *ignores* they are so stupid”.

no, it actually makes me upset. Part of why I try so hard is I make everything very personal to me. This isn’t a front, I’m not just doing things for fun, everything is really important to me. So when people say they just want something because it’s rare, it pisses me off and I’d like to punch them in the face.

But I do not like being insulted. I do not like being criticized for something I’m not even apart of. It makes me upset and to be completely honest, has ruined raiding for me. I don’t want to see it. I don’t want anything to do with it and I just wish it didn’t exist.

If I wanted to continued being bullied, I wouldn’t have been home schooled in the first place.

in a less depressing note, yay for another Livestream Q&A tomorrow…even if it’s short and probably won’t have many questions 🙁 I shall try and keep my hopes up.

oh, and the other new EC speeder (for defeating within 2 hours) looks like a shark and is kind of cute.

…still nothing on a possible pet yet though. :/